Jealousy is Hard
by Bobster1234
Summary: Sophie and Sian friendship. Sophie struggles with unusual feelings for Sian. Can she hide them or has their frienship gone forever? - I don't own any of the corrie characters -
1. Chapter 1

As my alarm bleeped at the side of my bed I groaned loudly ignoring it by pulling my duvet covers over my head. Just as I was beginning to drift back into a nice sleep I heard a shout from down stairs.

"AAAAAAHHHHHH." I bolted out of my bed and flew down to the kitchen.

"What happened?" I asked my sister Rosie in a panic.

"Omg, omg omg," she screamed, "look over there." I turned around expecting a man with a gun or something slightly scary. Instead there was a spider about the size of a penny up the wall.

"Is that it Rosie? Is that what you were screaming at?" I was fuming at her for waking me up for something so pathetic.

"What do you mean is that it? GET IT OUT." I grabbed a glass from the cupboard then trapped the spider while sliding a piece of paper under the crack between the glass and wall so I didn't harm the spider as I moved it.

"Why don't you just squish it?" Rosie squealed at me.

"I'm not doing that! Just be thankful I'm not letting it loose on you. I mean really, I could have had another 15 minutes in bed before school if it wasn't for you. What are you doing up this early?"

"I have a photo shoot. Don't have a go at me Soph. I'm traumatised. Just give me a second to regain my composure." She was such a drama queen. I waited for a minute but she didn't seem to be in the mood to stop being so dramatic so I left her to get changed for school.

Once I was changed into my uniform and half way through my toast there was a knock at the front door. "Come in," I shouted but the door was already flung open by my best friend Sian. She looked as perfect as ever with her long blond hair and her flawless skin. I immediately smiled when I saw her. She always made me feel happy.

"Guess what?" she said while grabbing a piece of my toast.

"What?" I asked her laughing.

"Me and Ryan. You know Ryan from down the street. We kissed last night!" My initial reaction was a feeling of betrayal but I had no idea why. Ignoring my strange emotions I reacted how any other best friend would.

"OOOO, where? When? How did it all come about?" She launched into her story of how she'd fancied him for a while and last night he'd invited her out for chips and they'd ended up kissing . To me it didn't sound very romantic and I felt a bit narked that she'd been on the street without coming to see me. It must have been my protective best friend instincts taking over.

"So are you two like dating or what?" I asked, for some reason dreading the answer.

"No I'm gonna play it cool for a while. I don't wanna look too keen." She answered laughing. Relief swept over me.

"Are you OK?" she asked.

'No' I thought it my head. I had no idea where this jealousy had suddenly sparked from. All I knew is I didn't like the idea of Sian and Ryan.

"Yeah. I'm fine I answered quickly, just tired. Come on we'll be late for school."

As I shouted goodbye to Rosie I tried to rid the feeling that had lodged in the pit of my stomach.

But the feeling of jealousy was running way to deep.


	2. Chapter 2

I never really had a particular problem with school. I enjoyed being around my best friend all day, we could giggle and laugh making lessons pass much quicker than they should. I just liked being around her. She made me feel better about myself. She laughed at my jokes and made me feel special, school or no school, Sian was there are that's all what mattered.

I felt in a particularly good mood while we sat eating our lunch along with our other mates. Next to me I heard a squeal of delight from Sian so I turned to see what she was so excited about.

"Ryan's invited me and you to his house tonight!" she said happily.

"Wait, what? Why me too?" I answered. The idea of sitting watching Sian and Ryan try to get in with each other wasn't exactly appealing.

"Coz his mate Lee's gonna be there. It'll be like a double date!"

"What, a date with someone I don't know. No thanks."

"Come on Soph you do know who he is. He's that tall dark haired fit lad."

"Oh yeah coz that's specific," I retaliated back.

"Come on Sophie, pleeeeeeeease. Can't you just do this for me? It will make it so less awkward if you're there too." She gave me her puppy dog eyes and my heart melted at the sight of her. I always gave into her. I would do anything to make her happy.

"Fine," I sighed heavily, "you win."

She grinned widely than hugged me. As she did this I could smell her distinct scent. In the most none creepiest way possible, I loved the way she smelt. Out of a line of 100 scents I knew I would easily be able to pick out hers. As she let go the bell rang for next period.

"Come on then. Lets go," I said unenthusiastically. I changed my mind, school would suck if all Sian spoke about was Ryan.

At 8 o'clock we made our way from my house to where Ryan lived above the kebab shop. I was dreading this but I didn't let it show. I acted as excited as Sian pretending I was looking forward to meeting Lee. We rang the door bell and waited. Ryan answered by giving Sian a swift kiss on the cheek. Even that small greeting made me want to punch him. What was wrong with me? Why was I so jealous? I ignored the questions in my head and held out my hand to Ryan.

"Hi I'm Sophie." I said shyly. I always felt like I was being judged in front of new people.

"Hey Sophie," he said quickly but I could tell his attention was glued to Sian. I couldn't blame him. She was wonderful.

"Come on up, Lee's waiting upstairs."

The 'date' was as awkward as I'd imagined. However there was a key thing that made my heart feel lighter. Sian and Ryan didn't seem to have much between them. There was hardly any chemistry from what I could see at all. They didn't seem like they were having much of a laugh. In fact I could tell Sian had her bored face on. I knew each of her expressions far too well; I'd seen her use each of them too many times.

Lee kept making advances of trying to put his arm round me while we watched the film but I subtly kept moving away. I couldn't even think about fancying him. I just couldn't be bothered. When the film was over Sian and I stood up to leave. Ryan kissed her briefly on the lips. This gave Lee the urge to try and do the same but I had no desire to kiss him whatsoever.

"It was nice meeting you," I said hurriedly while in the process of making my way to the door. This meant I left Lee looking stupid but I didn't even care. I just wanted to leave. Once outside Sian spoke first.

"So what did you think of Lee?" she asked tentatively.

"He was alright looking, but to be honest I didn't really fancy him," I answered truthfully. For some reason Sian seemed to look relieved.

"I better get the bus home," she said, "Dad will murder me if I come home to late on a school night. For a second time today she reached over and hugged me. The difference this time was this was a proper Sian hug. In my head no one could quite give hugs that made me feel as special and as loved as she could. My heart raced as I felt her body against mine and yet again that all two distinctive scent of hers made me feel dizzy.

I broke the hug suddenly feeling uncomfortable by the thoughts going round my head.

"See you tomorrow," I said while quickly walking away.

I needed to get away from her. Some of these feelings were getting to weird.


	3. Chapter 3

**Thanks for reading so far! If you could review and tell me how I'm getting on that would be very much appreciated. This is my first ever fic so I'm not sure if I'm doing ok! The end of this chapter switches POV to Sian while the girls are having a conversation. This just allows you all to see Sian's reaction to the conversation. Hope this works! Sorry about grammer mistakes, sometimes I don't pick them up when I'm reading the chapter back through! **

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It was Saturday and even after spending all week together at school me and Sian spent the afternoon sitting lazily in the park. It was a warm day so we sat in strappy tops and jeans enjoying the only bit of sun the UK would get to see this year. I couldn't quite believe my luck. Out of all the people in our school I couldn't believe that Sian wanted to spend it with me. Feelings of self doubt often followed me but unfortunately the more time I spent with Sian the more often I felt them. I just didn't feel good enough for her.

"So how's it going with Ryan?" I asked her, I knew she hadn't seen him since we'd been round to his house but she was constantly on her mobile texting him.

She looked over at me with her sparking blue eyes. To me they looked beautiful but there was an element of sadness expressed in them.

"I dunno," she said searching for the right words to describe how she felt, "it's just not really much of a laugh. Our conversations are a bit boring and when I'm with him I feel like I'm constantly searching for something to say to stop it from being awkward." This made my heart skip lightly but I ignored the feeling that had become so prominent when I was with her.

"It's like," she continued, "when I'm with you and we're just hanging out I don't feel like I constantly have to talk nonsense to stop it being awkward. It's just effortless. But with Ryan I feel like I'm working harder than I do at school just to keep the conversation flowing. It's kinda tiring."

Even though her words comforted me I still felt confused. There she praising me and our friendship yet I still had no idea why she hung out with me. I was burning to know yet I was scared to ask.

"Sian, I want to... Ask you something it's gonna sound kinda weird!"

She looked up waiting for me to continue but the words stuck in my mouth.

"What's up?" she sounded intrigued.

"I dunno how to put it."

"Sophie it's me you're talking to. You know you can tell me anything." I considered her words for a second and decided I had to ask her or else it would drive me mad.

"Why are you so bothered?" I asked her.

"Bothered about what?"

"Well... like why do you hang out with me? I know that sounds really lame but it's just been getting to me."

She looked at me stunned for a second then cracked a smile.

"Are you being serious?" She laughed.

"Eh yeah I am."

"Really? This isn't like one of your jokes?"

"No."

"Really?"

"Sian, why are you finding this so funny?" I said slightly hurt. What was making her laugh at me?

"Sorry Soph. I just find that such a weird question. You're my best friend. Why wouldn't I want to hang out with you?"

I shrugged not wanting to tell her what was really on my mind but she could see right through me.

"Sophie, come on you can't just ask a question like that and not do any explaining. What would make you even think about that?" I felt completely out of my depth now. I didn't want to let slip how much she meant to me but at the same time I wanted to see if I meant anything to her.

"I dunno it's just you could be one of the most popular girls in school yet you choose to hang around with me," I said openly, "all the boys fancy you yet you choose to hang around with me. It just doesn't fit." I looked down to the floor waiting on her to agree with me but when I looked up into her eyes she looked flabbergasted by my outburst.

"Soph, you have to believe me. You're more important to me than anybody in the world. Any lad, even my own family. I hang around with you because we have fun and you get me. You know I have more fun with you than all our friends put together. I'd trade all of them for you. You have to believe me about that." She looked at me honestly her eyes glowing with a look of fondness that was all for me. I stared back allowing some sort of spark ignite between us. My stomach was flipping like pancakes and all I wanted to do was reach out and touch her but I couldn't pluck up the courage. I broke our gaze again feeling I would do something I would later end up regretting.

"Thanks," I said shyly.

"Any time best friend."

Sian POV

I couldn't believe that I just had to explain how much she meant to me. Didn't she know that already. I thought she would have known that I couldn't live without her. That every morning I wake up and get excited about spending time with her. If anything I didn't deserve someone like her. She was caring, sweet, honest and she didn't even know it. She'd never been given enough credit from her Mum and Dad and I know realised that they had lodged major insecurities in her.

As I continued to look into her eyes the warmth within them made my heart melt. She was beautiful. I wanted to tell her this but I knew that that wasn't really what friends did.

"Thanks," she said finally breaking our eye contact.

"Any time best friend." I felt these worlds were appropriate because the feelings I had been experiencing mere seconds earlier weren't feelings of friendship. I needed to reinforce in my own mind more than hers that that's all we were.

As my heart beat turned back to normal the weird moment passed too.

"Are you OK?" I checked.

"Yeah sorry, you know what I'm like. Sometimes I feel like I'm always in other people's shadows."

"Well you're not OK. Me and you are equal. Now lets get away from all this serious chat and go get some chips.


	4. Chapter 4

**Thank you to everyone reading the story! And also A big thank you to everyone who has reviewed it. It gives me confidence to keep writing when I see them! Hope you like this chapter**

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After our conversation in the park we moved onto lighter topics. In no time at all we were back to our giggly selves. We got chips for tea then made our way back to my house. We always went back to mine rather than Sians, we both just seemed to go there automaticially.

As we walked through the door I heard my Mum call from the kitchen.

"Come through girls, I'm just about to put the tea on. Do you want some?" She knew without even looking up that Sian was with me. These past few weeks we'd been basically joined at the hip.

"We've had chips," I called back to her while we made our way into the kitchen.

"Chips! You girls aren't going to keep those figures if you keep eating junk."

"Chill Mum," I said to her in a patronising tone. She looked over at be disapprovingly but then looked over at Sian and smiled. My Mum and Dad for some reason absolutely adored Sian. Not that I was complaining, it basically meant she could be here whenever she wanted and my parents wouldn't bat and eyelid.

"Hi Mrs Webster," She said sweetly.

"Hi Sian, how's your Mum getting on in Southport? It must be nice for her living by the sea." Without waiting for an answer she launched into a story about how one day she'd like to move away from the street. I smiled to myself slyly; Sian always seemed to get me out of trouble when she was around.

When Mum had finally finished her rambling she got back to cooking her, Rosie's and Dad's tea leaving me and Sian free to escape to my bedroom. We sat talking for a while then put on a DVD. I innocently cuddled up to her unable to concentrate on the film when she was so close to me. After a while her fingers started roaming through my hair. Every time she made contact with me I felt the familiar swooping sensation in my stomach. I really did adore her.

Once the movie had finished we stayed in our cuddled up position.

"Are you over your strop from earlier?" she asked me half joking, half serious.

"I guess," I said embarrassed about my earlier outburst.

"Look Soph, I'll always be here for you so don't worry about ever being alone. I promise." I looked up at her grinning trying to get rid of the impulses I so dearly wished I could act upon. I moved away from her and slid under the covers.

"I better get going. My dad will be wondering where I am."

"Don't be stupid just text him and tell him you're staying over here. You're not walking home in the dark." I could tell she was happy by my suggestion because she didn't argue. She just picked up her phone happily quickly sending a message to her Dad then she also slipped under the covers. I dramatically bunched up the duvet and rolled over with it leaving her with nothing to cover her.

"Oi Webster. Give me those back!" I refused by shaking my head keeping a firm hold of them.

"Desperate times call for desperate measures." She started ticking me. She knew I was one of the most ticklish people in the whole world making me immediately let go of the covers. Even though she'd won she didn't let me go. She kept me pinned down tickling me till I could barely breathe from laughing.

"What's going on in here!" Rosie's voice came out of nowhere making Sian stop and get off of me. I looked up at her feeling slightly embarrassed for some reason.

"I was just getting the covers off of her; she's a pain in the ass to share a bed with!"

"Yeah if that's your story." Rosie had a smug look in her eyes that confused me. She only had that look when she seemed to think she knew something that nobody else did.

"Well I'll leave you to your 'tickling'. Night girls I'm away off out now." She left the room before either of us could say another word to her.

"What was up with her?" Sian asked innocently; she seemed to have noticed Rosie's weird behaviour too.

"Dunno, I never know what's going on in that brain of hers." As I mused over what Rosie was talking about, Sian took advantage of my vulnerability and started tickling me again.

"Siaaaaaann," I squealed. She'd managed to clamber on top of me completely pinning me down.

"Say I'm amazing," she said as I squirmed underneath her.

"No," I answered back playfully.

"Say it or I won't stop!"

"Fine," I said while laughing, "you're amazing."

She laughed at my surrender taking both my hands in hers. She still had me pinned down on the bed but I could face her now knowing she wouldn't tickle me. I had another one of my urges, all I wanted to do was lift up my head and kiss her but I wasn't brave enough. Neither of us said anything as the tension between us began to mount. She was softly stroking my fingers with her thumb. I could feel every nerve in my body begin to tingle. And my heart was beginning to beat faster as I looked into her blue sparkling eyes which had turned excited and electric.

As our heads started to move closer together Sian seemed to come to her senses. She broke the silence between us while getting off of me.

"Can I borrow some pyjamas?" She asked not looking at me properly. I got up too digging out a pair for her.

"I'll just go get changed," she said still not looking at me.

Sian POV

As soon as I reached her bathroom and locked the door I let out a huge sigh. What had nearly happened? I had her pinned down and my heart felt like it was going to explode. I wanted to kiss her so badly and I could tell by the look in Sophie's eyes that she felt the same. But I couldn't let it happen. It would ruin everything between us. I'd seen how ruining relationships could be. My Mum and Dad just argued and fought and never had time to love each other. It ruined everything between them and now when they saw each other all they did was fight. I couldn't lose Sophie. She meant absolutely everything to me. I got changed and gave myself a few minutes to compose myself. I went back into her room smiling and trying to wipe away the tension that had sprang out of nowhere a few minutes earlier. She looked at me shyly. God she was beautiful.

"Come on we better go to sleep or else I won't be able to get up tomorrow."

"You know it's kinda sad," she said to me, "We go to sleep just as Rosie goes out." I giggled.

"Yeah but Rosie's like a bat she only comes out at night!"

"Don't let her catch you saying that she'd murder you right on the spot." The awkwardness had finally managed to diffuse. We both just ignored what had gone on 5 minutes ago.

We got into bed but Sophie didn't cuddle up to me like she usually did. I couldn't bare being in the bed and not be close to her. She was like a magnet pulling me in. I needed to feel her next to me so I took the brave first move and snuggled up to her. I could feel her tense for a second but within no time at all she had relaxed and we both drifted off probably thinking the same thing.

Sophie POV

I awoke feeling Sian's body wrapped around mine. Somehow we'd managed to become completely entwined while we slept. I know realised what had awoke me. It was absolutely boiling. With the covers and Sian's body heat I felt almost on fire but I didn't want to let her go. I needed her close to me. There was no way I could get back to sleep feeling this uncomfortable so I concentrated on Sian's breathing. However when I really listened I realised her breathing was too quick to be asleep.

"Sian are you awake?" I whispered. There was silence for a minute then Sian answered.

"Yeah." After that neither of us said a word as our lips crashed together.


	5. Chapter 5

**Once againg thank you to everyone who is reading this fic and alerting it, and a big big thank you to the people who are reviewing it. I know this next chapter isnt one of my storngest but i thought id put it up anyway.**

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Sian POV

I awoke fairly early from the most comfortable sleep I'd probably ever had. I still had my arms wrapped around the brunette next to me. Last night's events came tumbling back to me quickly. We'd kissed and that was it but it had felt like the most incredible thing ever. Even though it was amazing deep down I realised that if I didn't stop this now we'd ruin everything. I couldn't do the relationship thing. Not with her. She meant everything to me and I couldn't have her hating me because that's what would happen. All relationships messed up. I now knew what I had to do. Even though more than anything else in the world I wanted to stay here wrapped in her arms I just couldn't. I had to leave and distance myself from her for a while. Then maybe my feelings for her would go back to just being best friends and we could go back to how we were. Go back to not feeling like my whole world evolved around her. My feelings scared me. The idea of her being a girl wasn't what bothered me at all. It had nothing to do with that. But these feelings were so intense and I'd never felt them before. Not for a boy or a girl. They scared me.

I unwrapped my arms from around her body and got away from the bed. I knew it looked like I was running away but in my head I was saving us. In my haste to get away I tripped over something on the floor and fell crashing down with a large thud. Sophie bolted upright waking up in an instant.

"What the hell," she said in a panic. Finally she realised that it was only me. "Sian, you, you were running away without speaking to me weren't you." I basically died inside when I heard the disappointment in her voice. I felt awful for hurting her but I was trying to save us. Trying to save myself.

"It's not how it looks," I said quietly.

"Sian it's exactly how it looks and you know it." She wasn't my sweet little Sophie any more. She was angry. Angry at me. Why couldn't she see I was doing this for us? More than anything I wanted to go over and kiss her and tell her we could be together forever but I just couldn't. We'd end up ruining everything. And I was scared.

"I'm sorry Sophie. I can't do this, not now." I'd managed to put all my clothes back on from last night. I looked back at her seeing tears in her eyes but I was saving her. Saving her from me. Without another word I walked out of her bedroom and practically flew down the stairs.

"Hey watch it," Rosie said to me, as I bumped past her on the stairs. She was obviously just coming in after her night out.

"Sorry," I mumbled. Without another word I existed the house leaving two confused Webster girls behind me.

Sophie POV

I couldn't believe she'd just left me like this. Last night had been amazing we'd kissed and held each other close. It had felt like the most perfect night in the world. Well to me anyway; I guess Sian had felt differently.

I heard Rosie shout at Sian for knocking into her on the stairs but it hadn't stopped her leaving the house. I'd scared her away.

Rosie came into my room looking a little worse for wear after being out all night.

"What was up with her?" Rosie asked me casually while perching on the end of my bed.

"Nothing," I said moodily. I'd gone numb making me unable to feel pain. I just felt empty.

"Sophie, are you alright? You look kinda funny." I just ignored her, willing her to go away so I could deal with what was going on in my head.

"Soph, why did Sian just run out of the house?" Again I ignored her hoping she'd lose interest and go away.

"Have you had a fight?"

"Sort of," I managed to say without breaking down into tears.

"You finally did it didn't you?"

"Did what I asked?" suddenly intrigued by what she had to say.

"You so got it on last night!" She said sounding completely delighted.

"ROSIE!" I answered shocked. "We did not get it on!" I couldn't believe she even thought that. I mean it wasn't far from the truth. But how did she know me and Sian had any other kind of relationship then friendship?

"Go on then look me in the eyes and tell me something didn't happen between you two last night. Go on a dare you." I looked at her with as much determination as I could possibly muster and said.

"We didn't... we didn't..." I couldn't do it, I couldn't lie.

"HAHAAA," she squealed with glee, "finally. So what happened?" I was completely and utterly embarrassed but more than anything I was shocked with how unbelievably normal Rosie was coping with the idea of me kissing a girl. She hadn't disowned me so far so I decided on telling her the truth.

"We just kissed. Nothing else happened but I think this morning she totally freaked out and tried to sneak out without me noticing. But I woke up before she could get out of the house."

"She's probably just a bit overwhelmed that's all. Give her a while to calm down and I'm sure she'll come round." She said this all so matter of factually; I couldn't believe my ears.

"Rosie, why are you not major freaking out about this? I just told you I kissed my best friend. I thought you of all people would find that completely crazy."

"Sophie Sophie Sophie, I've known about this for aaaaaaages!"

"How could you have known? I only just realised last night that I was in love with her." I said completely confused now.

"See, that I didn't know. I didn't realise you were actually in love with her. That's just so cute. But Sophie you'd have to be completely stupid not to see how much you adore Sian. And I've gotta say she can't hide how much she likes you either."

"But I didn't even realise!"

"That proves my point, you're stupid." I just couldn't get my head around the fact that a) she knew about me liking Sian before I even did and b) she was acting so cool with it. She was really a pretty amazing sister. I defiantly didn't give her enough credit.

"Do you think other people know? You know like Mum and Dad?" I asked suddenly panic stricken. This was difficult for me to get my head round. Let alone having the whole world know about it.

"Nah they're even dumber than you."

"Right," I put my head in my hands, it was all so messed up and complicated. I now fully acknowledged something that had been starring me in the face for a long time. I was in love with my best friend.

"So you say you love her?" Rosie asked sympathetically. I felt awkward talking about this with her but she'd proven herself so far so I had to trust her.

"Yeah. Well I think I do. I mean every time I see her my heart beats slightly faster. I literally ache when I'm not with her. I feel jealous when she's with guys. In fact I feel jealous when she's with anyone other than me."

"Sounds like love to me. Much deeper than what I've ever felt for anyone!" This was the first sisterly chat we'd properly ever had. We normally fought and argued leaving no time for us to actually be nice to each other. This was nice besides, my heart feeling like someone was trampling on it.

"Rosie does this not bother you at all?"

"Does what bother me?"

"That I'm in love with Sian?"

"No no I'm totally cool with that. I mean loves love when you think about it. Who has any right to tell you who to love?" I felt my jaw drop at her words.

"I don't think I've ever heard you say something so philosophical. Where's my air head sister gone?"

"Oh I'm still here but I'm totally not bothered about people being gay."

"I don't even know if I'm gay," I mumbled softly, "I don't think about other women like that, just, just her."

"Like I said Sophie, loves love." I couldn't believe me and my sister had just had this conversation. But with whatever was going to happen with Sian next, at least I knew I had my sister supporting me.


	6. Chapter 6

**Sorry about taking a while to update! annoyingly real life gets in the way sometimes. Keep reviewing my story it really does help me write the next chapter! **

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Sophie POV

I spent all of Sunday in a state of panic. I wanted to go round and see her but I took Rosie's advice and agreed to give her a bit of space. On Monday morning I waited for Sian to come round to my house before school, like she did everyday so we could catch the bus together. But she didn't. When I got to school I saw her with our group of friends already, she must have got here early to avoid me. I went over to them and joined in on the conversation but I felt false. I just wanted to speak to her. But she wouldn't look at me. The rest of the day was similar and so was the rest of the week. Me and Sian would be together within our group of friends but she made sure we were never alone together or she never sat right next to me. It felt like a kick in the face. I felt jealous when she was around the other girls. She laughed and joked with them like she had done with me and it hurt. It hurt to see how easily she could replace me.

Sian POV

I knew I was a complete and utter bitch for doing this but I just couldn't speak to her. If I did then I would probably succumb to my feelings for her. If I was near her all I wanted to do was talk to her but I didn't let myself. In fact all I wanted to do was hold her and tell her I was sorry for being a jerk and that I loved her but I couldn't. I wasn't brave enough and I doubted myself to much. So I put on a brave face and pretended that she didn't exist when in reality inside my head all I could think about was her. She meant everything to me and it scared me. If we did get together and things messed up then I would lose my world because in time I knew my feelings would only intensify for her. They were already so strong. It was better to distance myself now before I felt anymore in love with her.

I needed a distraction from her and I realised I had the perfect person

Sophie POV

The week had been probably one of the longest of my life. School was so dull without Sian constantly by my side. Jealousy seemed to make time tick by so slowly. On Saturday morning I decided to stay in bed rather than face another day without her. As I snuggled into my duvet my door flung open.

"Right get up now," I heard Rosie's voice order.

"Rosie just go away will you?" I said sleepily.

"Come on Sophie it's 1 o'clock in the afternoon. I am not having you sulking anymore."

"Is it? Oh well," I said not really caring.

"Soph if she won't talk to you at school them you're gonna have to go speak to her yourself. I bet she'd just being a wimp. Be brave Sophie I know you are." She was practically begging me.

"Why do you care so much?"

"Coz I actually care about your happiness. And you're well boring without Sian."

"Thanks," I muttered as she flounced out of the room in her usual Rosie manner. But she was right. I did need to speak to her. At least try and get her speaking to me again so then maybe we could go back to being friends. I missed her so much.

The walk to Sian's usually only took 15 minutes but I was dragging my feet and nearly turned back twice making the walk feel much longer. I got to her door and hesitated a few times but finally raised enough courage to ring the door bell. There was a lot of movement and scurrying until I saw the blonde figure finally open the door.

"Hey," I said to her nervously.

"Hey Soph, sorry but this really isn't a good time."

"When is Sian! Coz you don't talk to me at school, you don't come round my house anymore. You act like I don't exist! Please, please just talk to me." I barged past her giving her no choice but to let me into her house. I walked upstairs into her room before she could stop me. There was no way she was escaping talking to me. I'd stay here till we had spoken properly.

I opened the door of her bedroom but the site that met my eyes was not a welcome one. Ryan was lying on her bed with his top off looking very pleased with himself.

"Oh hey Sophie," he said casually not realising that him being there has just torn my world in two. "Thought you and Sian had fallen out?" Anger boiled from my insides. I felt sick, sick with envy and jealousy but most of all sick with disappointment and sadness. She didn't love me.

"Is that what she told you?" I said aggressively. I was about to continue but Sian cut me off before I could say anything else.

"Erm Ryan, would you mind leaving for a while? Me and Sophie need to have a chat." He looked pissed off but agreed to go. There was an awkward silence as he put his top back on. He then walked over to Sian gave her a hug before leaving.

"Aww isn't that nice. Bagged yourself the perfect man there. Thought you said you didn't really like him?"

"Yeah well things change," she said shyly her eyes not reaching mine, "so what do you want?"

"I wanted to sort stuff; our friendship. I miss you." Sian softened at my words but she shook herself then looked at me in the eyes.

"There's nothing to sort out. We've just grown apart that's all."

"That's absolute crap and you know it. Sian do you really want me to say it out loud because I will." She said nothing.

"We Kissed," I said to her slowly, "We very nearly did more than that too. And it wasn't just one random kiss. We spent all night together wrapped up in each other's arms."

"Ok ok I get it. It was a mistake. I'm sorry." My heart sunk, she didn't want me.

"So that's it is it? We're just gonna ignore each other for the rest of our lives?" I said to her angrily.

"Something like that." She still couldn't look at me.

"Sian, you're my best friend, for the last 5 years we've spent nearly every waking minute together."

"I don't need you anymore OK Sophie. I have new friends now." Finally her words hit me. She didn't need me anymore. I wasn't good enough for her and she had finally seen that. It wasn't even a surprise. All my life I hadn't been good enough. I'd never been good enough for my parents compared to Rosie and now Sian finally confirmed something I already knew deep down. I couldn't think of what to say so I said the only 3 words that were inside my head.

"I Love you," I said weakly.

"I'm sorry," Sian answered back. I could feel tears build in my eyes but there was one more thing I wanted to know before I left.

"Have you slept with Ryan?" She hesitated for a second.

"Yes."

That was it. The final straw. I turned around leaving the only person I had ever loved behind me.

Sian POV

"I Love you," I heard her say weakly. These words broke my heart in two. 'Come on Sian' I thought to myself. 'Be brave and tell her you love her back.' But I couldn't. I was too scared of the way she made me feel.

"I'm sorry," they were the only words I could think of. I was a coward. I could see Sophie was on the verge of tears.

"Have you slept with Ryan?" Her words stunned my brain for a second. Should I lie? If I lied then I knew she'd never forgive me and that would mean I could run from my feelings for her. Me and Ryan hadn't even kissed. He'd tried it on a few times but I couldn't do it. I didn't like him like that. And he had been sitting topless coz he'd spilt water all over his t-shirt. Nothing had happened.

"Yes." I said quietly. She believed me; she believed the lie that slipped out of my mouth. She'd finally lost all her courage and walked away, leaving me feeling like the world's most selfish bitch. I was. It was as simple as that. But I was petrified of the way she made me feel. My Mum and Dad had taught me one thing and that was that relationships never worked. It was better to be with someone like Ryan who made me feel safe then be with Sophie who I knew could rip my heart into a million pieces. But as I stood there I finally realised my mistake. I was too late. Sophie was already in my heart more then I had realised. The pain of losing her finally hit me. All I could do was curl up into a ball on the floor and cry.

What a mess.

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**Hope you liked it. I know most of you want them to be together straight away but this is my take on how I think their situation would have unfolded**

**It may take me a while to get the next chapter up because I'm gonna be busy they next few days but I will get it up as quickly as I can. Keep reviewing, THANKS! xx  
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	7. Chapter 7

**Sorry for the delay but once again real life gets in the way. Hope you enjoy my next chapter. Thank you very much for the reviews they are very much appreciated and really make me want to keep writing this fic!**

**I don't own Corrie or any of the characters unfortunatly.**

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It had been a month since my argument with Sian. It had been exactly a month since I'd given up hope that we were ever going to be friends. It had been 2 weeks since my Mum had found out that my Dad had been cheating on her. It had been 1 week since he'd moved out. It had been 5 days since Rosie had left to London for a few weeks to work on a modelling job. It had been 3 days since I started to feel completely alone. It had been 2 days since I started drinking to stop myself feeling so lonely. It hadn't been a good month.

I was in the middle of getting ready for school until I realised I had no desire to go. Seeing Sian at a distance everyday was far too painful. She wasn't mine anymore. She wasn't my best friend. But I missed her so much that I could feel my heart ache permanently. There was a hole in my chest that nothing else seemed to fill and everyday it just got deeper and deeper.

My Mum just left for work so bunking off of school was easy. I didn't even care about the trouble I was going to get myself in when people found out. It all seemed so trivial somehow. I dressed into jeans and a hoody neither looking nor caring about my appearance. I then grabbed the vodka bottle I had managed to buy from a dodgy off licence, relishing the fact that I didn't have to see Sian's face today which usually made the pain inside 100 times worse.

Sian POV

The past month had been completely lonely and it was all my fault. I finally told Ryan that I didn't want anything to happen between us and we hadn't spoken since. I knew I ruined everything I touched; me and Ryan, my Mum and Dad's relationship and the one that hurt the most; me and Sophie's relationship. At school I relished the times I got to watch Sophie out of the corner of my eye. She was often surrounded by a group of friends but she still didn't seem herself. She looked lonely. But who was I kidding, she had most likely moved on forgetting about me. So I kept my distance.

On this particular day I noticed Sophie wasn't in classes. The day was painfully slow without knowing where she was and if she was ok. The next day was the same; again she hadn't turned up. I missed her presence even though I hadn't talked to her in over a month. I just missed seeing her face. She was probably just off ill and would be fine tomorrow but for some reason at the end of the day I found myself getting on the bus to her house. I got off at her stop without even having a plan in mind. I didn't know what I was going to say to her but all I knew was that I needed to see if she was safe. As I walked to her doorstep, my heart seemed to hammer as loud as my footsteps. I didn't even give myself a chance to chicken out as I rung the doorbell the second I reached her door. I braced myself for her shocked reaction but it wasn't Sophie at the door. It was her Mum.

"Hello Mrs Webster is Sophie in?" I asked shyly. When I looked at her Mum I could tell something was wrong. She seemed agitated.

"Actually no she's not; in fact I have no idea where she is. I just got a call from the school and they said she hasn't been in for two days."

"Oh," I said suddenly worried.

"She got up both mornings pretending she was going to school. But I've left for work before she goes so it's perfectly easy for her to skip. And I was late home last night so she easily got in without me realising. I got a call from the school about lunchtime today. Could you try calling her Sian? She would probably answer you." I doubted this somehow and I felt bad that I was teaming up with her Mum but all I wanted was to know Sophie was ok so I did as I was told. The phone rang for 15 seconds then when straight to voicemail.

"Sorry Mrs Webster, she's not answering."

"First Kevin leaving and now Sophie acting up. I really don't have the energy for this."

"What? Mr Webster left?" I asked shocked.

"Did Sophie not tell you what happened?" She asked equally as shocked.

"No she hasn't... well I haven't seen much of her lately." Sally looked at me suspiciously but didn't say anything.

"I'll keep trying to call her Mrs Webster and if I hear from her I'll let you know."

"Thank you Sian. I'd appreciate that." We said our goodbyes but as the door shut I felt a sudden guilt flood through me. Sophie's family were obviously going through a rough time and I hadn't been there for her. I'd been selfish and ran away from her when she needed me. I had to find her and check she was ok. I began to wonder where she would go. She obviously wanted to avoid people so she must be somewhere where not many people would go. Only one place came to mind and that was the spot in the park where we used to go to hang out and spend time with each other. It seemed unlikely that she would be there but it was worth taking a look. I needed to find her.

Sophie POV

Even though I'd bunked off school to avoid Sian I still went to a place that reminded me of her. It was the place where we had spent many hours just chilling out and laughing in the park. No one else generally came over here and that was one of the reasons why I liked it so much. It had always just been me and Sian. Now however I sat cold and alone with an empty bottle of vodka beside me. Yesterday I had come home slightly drunk but my Mum hadn't been there to see. Today I was even worse for wear and didn't even contemplate the idea of going back home. The house was depressing and no one cared if I was there or not. I looked down at the bottle and realised how much I had actually drank today. My head felt light and dizzy but the alcohol still didn't have the effect I was hoping for. I couldn't forget about Sian.

Sian POV

I raced round to the park wondering whether my efforts were pointless or not. I was probably on a wild goose chase. But when I got to the area me and Sophie used to sit I saw a figure. It was getting quite dark around me but I could tell it was her. As I got closer to her I could see a bottle of drink lying next to her. This shocked me. Sophie had never been much of a drinker. She was sitting down but she was looking away from me so I had to call out to her.

"Soph, what are you doing here?" I asked gently. I continued walking towards her until I was about a meter away. She stood up clumsily and looked around at me frowning. I could tell from the way she was swaying that she was drunk.

"Wh-what you doing here don't you mean?" she said looking slightly angry.

"I came to find you, you've been skipping school."

"Yeah to get away from you so could you leave now please?" she slurred. Her words hurt but she had many reasons to absolutely despise me.

"I know I've been awful to you but please let me just walk you home then once your more sober we can talk."

"No...NO, there," she stammered, "is no way that I'm gonna let you just run... away from me after taking me home. I can, can get back myself." She swayed slightly as she spoke and started walking in any random direction as if to convey her point.

"Please, you're not in any state to walk home yourself. Just let me take you."

"NO," she screamed at me. Tears were in her eyes. I had never seen her look so angry. So hurt. So unlike Sophie. She started to walk off but there was no way I was going to let her walk home on her own in this state. I followed her knowing she was going in the completely wrong direction.

"Sophie your house is this way." I said while grasping her shoulders with my hands and spinning her around. She lashed out at me to making me unable to keep a hold on her.

"Maybe I don't want to go home."

"Fine," I said to her, "wherever you're going I'm coming with you." As we walked towards the main road at the edge of the park I quickly slipped my phone out of my pocket so I could call Sally to tell her where we were. Before I got the chance to do that Sophie had got to the main road and started walking in the middle of the road without looking out for cars.

"Sophie," I shouted while running towards her, "Get off of the road." She didn't listen so I ran to get her dragging her out of harm's way. When we got to the pavement I slipped my hand in hers so she couldn't get away again. For about a minute it seemed to have worked and she wasn't causing any fuss but suddenly she ripped her hand out of mine angrily.

"Don't you dare go acting like everything's ok," she said loudly.

"I'm not I just want to get you home," I pleaded with her.

"Get away from me," she shouted suddenly. As she did this she pushed me into the closest wall then backed away from me.

"Sophie STOP," I screamed at her. After that everything else seemed to happen in slow motion. As Sophie backed away from me she stumbled off of the pavement and onto the road. A car travelling to quickly knocked her to one side. With the momentum from the car she was flung back making her head slam against the kerb.

All I could see was a lot of blood.


	8. Chapter 8

**I had a bit of spare time on my hands so managed to get the next chapter written. Thank you for all the amazing reviews, they are fab! Hope you like this chapter**

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Sian POV

My life felt unlike my own as I sat next to an unconscious Sophie in the ambulance. She looked frail but still beautiful even though she was covered in blood. The paramedics had strapped her into a next brace making her look slightly alien. All I could do was hold her hand. Hold her hand and pray that she was going to be ok.

When we got to the hospital she was rushed out of my sight leaving a nurse to explain the situation to me.

"The doctors are just checking that your friend hasn't had any serious head injuries or problems to her spine. They're going to do a CT scan on her brain and that will give us some more information."

"But she's going to be ok?" I stammered.

"Hopefully," the nurse said to me with a smile, "but if she has done damage to her brain there could be some serious or life threatening consequences."

"No, please, no, she has to be ok. This is all my fault."

"Try not to blame yourself," she said soothingly, "you did all you can and got the ambulance there immediately."

"It's still my fault," I muttered quietly. It was

"There is another cause for concern," the nurse said, "Does your friend drink a lot? We need all the information we can get."

"Not that I know about. Honestly, it really isn't like her." The nurse gave me another soothing look.

"I've called Sophie's mother so she's on her way now. Take a seat there, she shouldn't be too long."

As I sat down the realisation of the situation hit me. Sophie could die. She may never get to know that I love her. She may never get to realise that she is the most important person in my world. I finally realised how stupid I had been. I hadn't let my feelings for Sophie in because I was a coward. I was scared that I wouldn't be good enough for her. I was scared of the intensity of my feelings for her. I was scared because every relationship I've seen has fucked up. But really I'd messed this one up without even giving it a chance. And now, finally, I had realised what I had done. I may never get my Sophie back and it was all my fault. The only person in the world that I had truly loved. As I sat realising the severity of the situation Sally came running towards me.

"Sian, Sian. What happened? Is she going to be ok?"

"I'm so sorry Mrs Webster. I tried to get her home safely. I found her in the park and she was... was," I stuttered on whether to tell her Mum the truth but I guessed she would find out anyway, "she was drunk. She wouldn't let me take her home. I tried calling you but she ran off before I got the chance. When I found her again she shoved me then walked backwards onto the road. A car hit her straight away."

Sally looked stunned, "she was drunk?"

"Yeah," I said sadly. I may be brave enough to finally admit my feelings for Sohpie to myself but there was no way I was gonna tell Sally about what had gone on between us.

"Mrs Webster, I'm so so sorry. I tried to get her home but I couldn't manage. Hate me all you want I don't mind."

"Sian sweetheart I don't hate you. The only thing that matters now is that Sophie is ok. Has anyone told you anything?"

"Only that they are taking her for test to see the damage her brain is in," I answered weakly.

We sat in silence for a long time until Sally finally spoke.

"The problems between me and her Dad have really got to her. This is my fault."

"Sally you can't blame yourself. It's my fault, me and Sophie fell out and I haven't been there for her when she's needed me. I did this."

Sally looked at me then shook her head. "It's got to be a number of things that have got to her. Rosie's moved down to London for a while too. I know she misses her."

"I guess," I said to her, "but now no matter what it takes I'm gonna be there for her. I promise."

"I know you will. Let's just hope we have her here so we can both make it up to her."

On movies they always say when you're waiting for news time passes slowly. In reality it's not quite like that. Time was passing in an excruciatingly slow blur. I couldn't concentrate on anything and every time I looked at the clock I swear it had gone backwards. Kevin, Sophie's Dad, finally joined us. I could feel the hostility between Sally and Kevin but nothing kicked off. They were both just worried about their daughter. My head was in my hands. This was the most terrified I had ever felt.

When I looked up at the clock for what felt like the millionth time I noticed the nurse from earlier make her way towards us. All 3 of us stood up bracing ourselves for the news she was about to hit us with. I was shaking.

"It's mostly good news," the nurse said to us smiling, "the CT scan shows that she hasn't got any severe brain damage or overly complex problems. Unfortunately she has fractured her skull so we will need to keep her in for a while to keep a watch on it. It's an open fracture which can easily get infected so she has to take antibiotics to minimise that risk. She also broke her arm due to the way she landed."

"But she's going to be ok?" Kevin asked.

"The doctor says she was extremely lucky but he says it's almost certain she'll make a full recovery."

"Almost certain?" I asked bravely.

"With head injuries you can't always be sure but honestly even though it doesn't seem like it a cracked skull is one of the best outcomes she could have got. At the moment she's unconscious but two of you can go through and see her."

Sophie's parents followed the nurse. She led them into the room where Sophie was lying unconscious. I followed behind them leaving them to go in. I could see Sophie through the window and once again all I could notice was her beauty. Even when she was dressed in a hospital gown and had wires running in her to monitor her stability she still looked gorgeous. I don't know how I never noticed it before. I looked down at my watch realising it was 10 o'clock. I couldn't believe in the last few hours I had nearly lost her. It had finally put everything into perspective.

A while later Kevin and Sally came out into the corridor.

"We're going to go get a coffee. Do you want to go in and see her while we're away?"

"Yeah, thanks," I answered back nervously.

"Oh and Sian have you told your parents your here? I just realised they'll be worried sick."

"Yeah I text my Dad and he said he would come get me whenever but I wasn't going to leave till I knew she was gonna be ok."

"She'll be fine Sian. Once you've seen her you should head home. You've gone through a lot today." I nodded towards them but secretly I had no intention to go anywhere. Once they had gone I composed myself ready to see Sophie. Once in the room I could really see the damage from the accident. She had bruises down her side and scratches all over her face; her head was bandaged with a light dressing. It broke my heart seeing her look so broken. Before sitting down on the chair next to her I placed a timid kiss on the tip of her nose. I was scared to touch her anymore in case I made any of her injuries any worse. Once I settled down in the chair the nurse from earlier came in.

"You can talk to her you know. It might help her come round if she hears a familiar voice."

"I don't really know what to say," I said truthfully.

"Just talk to her about something she cares about. Anything really." The nurse finished whatever she was dong leaving me and Sophie alone in the room.

"Hey Soph. It's me." I said hopelessly. "I know I'm not one of your favourite people at the moment but I just need you to wake up." I wasn't sure on what else to say but I decided on practising telling the truth. If she was gonna be ok, sooner or later I was going to have to tell her this.

"Look Sophie, I have been a world class idiot. No I've been worse than that. You're my best friend in the entire world and I can't believe how much I have messed up. I shouldn't have lied to you. I should have just told you the truth but I was scared. You make me feel like I have never felt before. Yeah these feelings do scare me but I should have talked to you about them rather than running away. But tonight I almost lost you. And well... well I just need to tell you

I Love you."

I looked over at her and what met my eyes shocked me I could see her lips moving trying to form words. She was coming round.

"I... I...," she struggled, "I love you too, when you're not being an idiot."

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**Thanks for reading, please review!**


	9. Chapter 9

**I Just wanted to say a quick thank you to all of you who have reviewed the story so far. I want to say an even BIGGER thank you to all of you who review regularly, it really realy really means alot! so THANKS! I know there's not been much of Sophie and Sian as a couple but I wanted to try and keep it all realistic! Anyway enough of me rambling!**

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Sian POV

A tiny smile lit across my face as she said those words but I wiped it off as quickly as it had arose.

"Sssssh Soph. Don't talk, I'm just gonna buzz for the nurse."

"Nurse? Wh-what happened?" She asked. Her voice was deep and hoarse from being unused.

"You were in an accident. But you're gonna be ok." As I said this I pressed on the buzzer for the nurse. Within 30 seconds she had arrived.

"Sophie," she said brightly, "we didn't expect you to be awake so soon. This is very good though." Sophie continued to look confused; it all must be quite disorientating.

"I'm just going to get the doctor Sophie so he can check over you." The nurse left the room leaving me and a confused Sophie.

"What did I do?"

"You, you, erm, you got drunk. Then you walked out in front of a car by mistake. I'm so sorry, I tried to save you but I couldn't. It all happened so quickly."

"I'm still confused though," she said to me gruffly.

"What are you confused about?"

"Why are you here? I thought you hated me?" I looked at her with shock in my eyes but before I got a chance to say anything the nurse came back in the room followed by the doctor.

This conversation would have to wait.

Sophie POV

I could see the shock in her eyes as I asked her this; but why should she be shocked? I thought it was obvious that she hated me. My mind tried to race back to what she had been saying as I woke up but I couldn't quite grasp it. My mind was too jumbled to grasp what she's said.

Before she got the chance to answer the doctor and nurse came into the room.

"Nice to see you're awake," the doctor said, "you've had a very lucky escape."

"What's exactly wrong with me?" I asked him. I just realised I had no idea the damage the car had done. All I knew was that I had a pumping sore head.

"You're got a fractured skull and a broken arm. Hopefully there are no other complications. I just need to run some test on you now that you're awake to check everything is in working order." I let the doctor work on me checking that everything vital was working. I didn't mean to feel ungrateful but all I wanted to do was talk to Sian.

"You seem to be in complete working order there sophie other then the cracked skull and broken arm. Like I said you're a lucky lucky girl."

"How long will it take this all to heal?" Sian asked nervously. I felt my heart lighten slightly; atleast she cared.

"Well the broken arm is a very common one. It'll probably take about 6 weeks to heal properly. You'll have to keep a cast on for the majority of that time. You're skull on the other hand doesn't need any treatment. Now the outside bleeding has stopped we can take off the dressing we have on it. We'll have to keep you in for a few days because head injuries aren't to be taken lightly. But I have to say I think you're going to be just fine." He left after giving me a few more instructions and the nurse said she'd go get my parents to tell them I was awake.

Once again Sian and I were left alone. I felt groggy and tired but her being there helped. I still couldn't forget all the shit she had put me through, all the stuff with her sleeping with Ryan still really hurt but at the moment I was just happy to be back on speaking terms with her. I turned around to look at her but when I met her eyes I could see sparkling tears in her eyes.

"Come over here," I said to her gently. It was awkward between us because we were both avoiding the conversation that would eventually have to come but now defiantly wasn't the right time or place. I held out my good arm to her to show I wanted a cuddle. She hesitated for a second looking scared she would hurt me but she knelt beside my bed and wrapped her arms around me. For the first time in a month I got to smell her beautiful unique smell. The smell that made me feel happy.

"I've missed you," she said crying properly now, "so much."

"Sophie you're awake!" I heard my Mum's voice from the door. Sian stepped away from me quickly and wiped her tears away so they couldn't see she'd been crying. My Mum rushed over to me and took my non broken arm in her hand.

"Heya Sophie," my Dad said also coming into the room, "you gave us all quite a scare." I couldn't believe they were both in the same room together. Only 2 weeks ago I had heard my Mum scream at my Dad saying she never wanted to see him again.

"I'm sorry," I said to them both sincerely.

"Why were you drinking?" Mum asked me gently.

"Not now eh Sal. We'll save that question for when she's feeling a little stronger." I smiled at Dad thanking him for saving me from any awkward questions at the moment. We all stayed in silence for a while until Mum finally spoke.

"Sian love you can get off now. You know that she's safe so you might as well go get some sleep." Sian looked slightly panicked.

"No really Mrs Webster. I'm ok here."

"Don't worry Sian there's no point now. We can look after her from here." Sian still looked unhappy but she nodded in agreement with my Mother. I felt completely miserable that Sian was going. I wanted to stay here all night with her. Sian turned and looked at me sadly.

"I'll come see you tomorrow Sophie." She couldn't say anything more with my parents in the room so she left quite quickly.

This was gonna be a very long night.

Sian POV

There was no way I was leaving the hospital. I'd left her too often lately when she needed me most. I wasn't going to make that mistake again. I went back out into the main waiting area and found myself a corner of the room where no one could see I was still there. Relief coursed through my system. The doctor said she was going to be alright. I now had a chance to rectify me and Sophie's relationship. I could put it all right. I wasn't really sure what right was though. I knew that that I loved her but I still had no control over the powerful feelings I had for her and I hated not being in control. Whatever was going to happen between us I knew that after the past month I couldn't not have her in my life. She would always be my best friend.

I text my Dad to tell him I wouldn't be home tonight and that I was staying with Sophie. He didn't put up any fuss. There were only two things that bothered my Dad one was women; after his and mum's messy marriage he hadn't managed to move on and the other was me dating.

Sophie's parents left at about 12 o'clock. I saw them leave through the main hospital door. That meant Sophie was in her room on her own. I didn't like the idea of her being alone but I knew I couldn't go see her. I wasn't family so one of the nurses would kick me out. I also knew that me staying here was pretty pointless but I couldn't just leave. Even though she had no idea I was here it made me feel better. As if I was finally making a brave effort to show how much she meant to me.

I drifted in and out of sleep for the rest of the night. Most people were too wrapped up in their own family problems so they didn't give me a second glance which suited me just fine. By 8 o'clock in the morning I decided it was a reasonable hour to go check and see if Sophie was ok. I didn't know what the visiting hours were but if the nurses caught me I would just come back to the waiting area. I made my way to the room she was staying in. Before I walked in I looked through the little window and saw that she was fast asleep. I quietly snuck into the room so I didn't wake her and sat on the chair next to her bed. She looked so peaceful and I had no intention to disturb her. As I watched her sleep without getting bored I realised I was in deep shit. Being fascinated by her tiny movements she made while sleeping really did mean I cared about her.

After about half an hour I noticed Sophie begin to stir. I felt butterflies in my stomach when I realised that it was once again just going to be me and her. She opened her beautiful eyes. It took her about a minute to realise I was in the room.

"Sian? What time is it?"

"Dunno, like half 8 or something."

"Are you even allowed here at this time?" she asked groggily.

"Dunno," I said again, "I'll leave if you want."

"No," she said hastily, "you just caught me off guard."

"Sorry."

"It's ok," she said lightly.

"I wasn't talking about that." I answered bravely.

"Oh," she said gently.

"Sophie I am so sorry. I've treated you awfully. I wasn't there for you when you needed me most and I don't deserve your forgiveness. But please, this last month has been shit without you. I really miss you and..."

"Sian. Stop it," she said cutting me off, "you don't need to apologise. We're friends ok? And friends forgive each other." She sounded quite blunt and I felt slightly disappointed that she didn't want to discuss what had happened between us more but I was just relieved that she had forgiven me.

Sophie POV

I listened to her apology but I realised I didn't want to really talk about what had happened. She would only run off again if our kiss came up in conversation so I cut her off before she got a chance.

"Sian. Stop it, you don't need to apologise. We're friends ok? And friends forgive each other." I realised I was being blunt but I didn't want to lose her again. I knew she could never love me like I loved her so I made it easy for her and exaggerated the point of us just being friends. There was an awkward moment between us before Sian cut the silence.

"How are you feeling anyway?"

"My heads still banging and I'm aching everywhere but I guess I'm lucky that that's all that is wrong."

"Yeah I guess you're right but still I don't like seeing you hurt." I smiled slightly at her sentence. She did seem to genuinely care.

"Did you get home ok last night?" She hesitated slightly before answering.

"Yeah fine." She looked slightly shifty as she spoke. I took her in properly and realised she was wearing the same clothes she had on last night. Her hair was messy and she looked tired.

"Sian, why are you wearing the same clothes as yesterday?"

"Oh am I? I didn't notice."

"Oh really?" I answered with a smirk.

"Really."

"Really?" I was finding it difficult to keep a straight face.

"Fine you win! I didn't go home, I stayed in the waiting room all night." Somehow I had already worked that out so it didn't shock me but I still felt my heart strings tug dramatically. God she was so cute.

"Thank you," I said lightly.

"For what?"

"For caring." We stared at each other for a long time. Her eyes mesmerised me and I didn't want to drop my gaze.

The door opened finally making us look away from each other.

"Morning Sophie," my Mum said brightly, "how are you feeling today?"

"Just a bit sore."

"Oh Hi Sian you're here early." She stated.

"Yeah I couldn't sleep," Sian lied.

I couldn't help but feel happy as I lay in the hospital bed. Sian had hurt me. I wasn't sure if she was still with Ryan but if she was I knew that would continue to hurt me. I could deal with that though. As long as she was still in my life I could deal with anything.

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**Thanks for reading! if you have a spare second please review**


	10. Chapter 10

**I had the day off work today so I thought I would just keep writing. I hope you like this chapter, it's been my favourite one to write so far so i hope that comes across in my writing**

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Sian POV

A week later Sophie had finally been let out of hospital. I'd been to visit her every day meaning slowly but surely our relationship stopped being awkward. We had always been so natural together and awkwardness didn't suit us. We went back to our giddy happy selves. We talked briefly about Sophie drinking. She admitted she had felt lost and just wanted an escape. She promised she'd only got drunk a couple of times and she admitted that she didn't even like doing it. I believed that she wouldn't do it anymore so it wasn't mentioned again.

I was on my way round to her house in the pouring Manchester rain but my spirits felts bright as I realised there would be no doctors or nurses ruining our time together. As I knocked on her front door I was surprised when Rosie answered it.

"Hey Sian," she said sounding not her usual airy fairy self.

"Hey Rosie, didn't realise you were back from London."

" I'm just here for the night, I have some promotional work in this new bar in town. They wanted only the best to promote it so of course they asked me." I sniggered at her confident answer.

"Is Sophie in?"

"No, actually she's gone out with Mum for a bit of Saturday shopping. Think they'll be another hour or so."

"Oh that's ok I'll come back later." I turned to leave but Rosie's voice stopped me.

"Actually Sian do you mind coming in the house for a while? I want to talk to you about something." I was bewildered. Me and Rosie were friendly with each other but we never spent time together if Sophie wasn't there.

"Ehh sure." She turned allowing me to follow her into the house.

"Do you want a drink?" she asked still sounding slightly hostile.

"No I'm ok thanks."

"Right Sian I've never been one for not saying what I think and this is no different."

"Ooookay," I answered feeling totally confused.

"Sophie."

"Yeah, what about her?"

"Stop hurting her." Her words caught me off guard.

"I'm.. I'm..not," I said weakly.

"Oh come on Sian don't deny it." I felt confused, what did Rosie know? "I know you guys kissed."

"What has Sophie said?" I was panicking now what if Rosie told everyone.

"Nothing. Well I guessed that you two had kissed the day you stormed out our house and Sophie admitted that. Other than that she's hardly told me anything. But Sian she doesn't really need to tell me anything. I know my sister and I can be quite good at reading people as well. I know you love her." My heart was pounding fast. I couldn't believe Sophie's air head sister was telling me who I loved.

"Rosie I think you've got the wrong end of the stick."

"SIAN listen please! Just stop denying it to me ok. I don't mind that you're a girl. I just see that you can make Sophie really happy, and that's all that matters to me. I've watched you and Sophie's relationship grow and it's not a normal friendship. You two have something so special. Please don't throw it away."

I was too stunned to speak. Should I tell her truth?

"Look what are you scared of?"

"Losing her."

"You nearly did that last month."

"No, I mean really lose her. Like, my Mum and Dad. I watched their relationship deteriorate all the way through my childhood. In the end my Dad started getting violent. There was a few times he beat up my Mum like really badly. They ended up not only despising each other but scared of each other too." This was the first time I had ever told anyone this. I hadn't even told Sophie. "What if me and Sophie turned out like that? What if I did something that awful that I hurt her not only mentally but physically too? Not only do I love Sophie but she's my best friend. She means everything to me. I can't have her scared of me or hating me."

"Sian you're not your Dad. Or your Mum for that matter. No offence but whenever I've met them they seem to be like total jerks." I smiled slightly at Rosie's honesty. "You're scared of hurting Sophie. I get that, but in reality Sian you're hurting her so much more this way. I know she loves you. Just give it a chance. Please, just be brave and take a chance on yourself." I was shocked by the honesty of our conversation but I was even more shocked at realising Rosie was right. Why didn't I just jump? I loved Sophie. Why didn't I just tell her?

"Thank's Rosie," I answered shyly.

"It's ok babes. But if you fuck her over again I will defiantly not be this nice." Her voice was full of threat but she smiled at me after.

"Rosie can I go wait for Sophie in her room? I think we need to have a chat." But Rosie didn't answer.

"I think you're right," Sophie's voice came from behind me. I wheeled around realising Sophie was standing at the front door. Me and Rosie had got so into our conversation that neither of us had realised we were being overheard. Thankfully Sally didn't seem to be anywhere in sight.

"Sophie. How much of that did you here?"

"All the important bits I think," she answered back bravely. Rosie stood looking extremely amused.

"This is _well_ awkward. Where's Mum Soph? I think I'll go find her wherever she is. You two may need to do some talking."

"She's in the pub," Sophie answered not really paying Rosie any attention. Rosie giggled but as she walked past me she whispered into my ear so Sophie couldn't hear.

"Be brave." She didn't give either of us a backwards glance leaving me and Sophie alone in the house.

"Is that true about your Mum and Dad?" Sophie asked boldly. What was with these Webster girls they seemed to always want the complete truth.

"Yeah."

"Why haven't you ever mentioned this before? How old were you when it happened?" I felt my heart hammer and I could feel tears in my eyes.

"Erm I think they started getting violent with each other when I was about 7. I realised it was wrong but I never said anything. It was only when I saw my Dad push my mum down the stairs that I said anything to him when I was about 12. But he pinned me up against the wall and told me never to mention it. My Mum got taken away in an ambulance and luckily all she had wrong with her was a broken leg. But when I went to the hospital I asked her if I could tell the police. She made me promise that I would never ever mention it to anyone or else I might be in danger. She told everyone that she had just fallen down the stairs

When my Mum and Dad finally broke up and Mum moved out I was scared. But I learnt after a few weeks that Dad wouldn't hurt me. He's never laid a finger on me except from when he pinned me up against the wall that one time. I know he won't ever forgive himself for frightening me like that and I'm not scared to live with him. He's my Dad and he won't ever hurt me."

Sophie's expression was one of pure shock. She obviously had no idea about this part of my past.

"Sian if you ever want to talk about this. I'm always here and I swear on my life I will never tell a sole."

"Thanks. But really I know my Mum is safe and happy now so it doesn't really bother me anymore. It was quite a long time ago. It's just left me thinking that relationships always end in disaster"

"So did you mean what you said to Rosie? Do you really, you know, love me?" She looked embarrassed asking me such a question. I could feel my palms start to sweat, my heart rate quickened and I felt slightly dizzy but this was my chance to be brave.

"Yeah I do."

Sophie POV

"So did you mean what you said to Rosie? Do you really, you know, love me?" I couldn't believe I had asked her such a bold question but seeing as Sian was finally opening up I had to ask.

"Yeah I do." Her answer made my heart burst with joy but there was still one more thing I needed to ask her. It was something neither of us had spoken about since I had been round to her house the day we fell out.

"What about Ryan?" I was scared of her answer. I could see the hesitation on her face and it took her a few seconds to find the right words.

"Sophie, there was never really a _me_ and Ryan. Not really. I'm really really sorry but I lied to you. We never slept together. I just said that so you hated me. I said it so you'd never want to be with me yourself. I'm sorry I lied but at the time I thought it was for the best" Finally it felt like a huge wait had been lifted off my shoulders. She's never slept with Ryan! I was gutted that she has felt the need to lie to me but now after over hearing what she had told Rosie I realised why she had done it. She was just scared.

"You have no idea how many sleepless nights I've had because I thought that." I wasn't blaming her. I just wanted to let her see the relief I felt.

"Sorry, I know it was a horrible thing to say. But I'd never do that to you." The month of jealousy had all been for nothing. I had felt like a green eyed monster had lived on my back for the past month but finally he had been shot down by Sian. She loved me, she actually loved me. There was no need to feel jealous anymore.

"Sophie seeing as we're being completely honest with each other can I ask you a question?"

"Sure."

"Well it sounds kinda weird but after you know the night me and you, you know, kissed. How didn't you realise then that I loved you then? We just worked so perfectly together." I considered her question for a second but seeing as we were being so truthful with each other I decided that I would continue this trend.

"All my life I've been second best. Rosie's always been the important one and I've always been in her shadow. She got all the attention from our parents. She was the one that went to private school and she's always been the one who's had all the attention from boys. I dunno it's kinda weird but I think I've just got used to not being good enough. And then you came along and you wanted to be my best friend. Because no one had ever really given me any attention before I felt like I didn't deserve it. Or at some point you'd realise I was a bit shit and run." This was the first time I had admitted to anyone how unconfident I was.

"We're a bit of a messed up pair," Sian said smiling nervously, "Sophie to me though. As cheesy as it sound's you'll always be my number one." I beamed at her cheesy line.

"Thanks. So what now?"

Sian POV

I now realised that we'd had our whole conversation standing at opposite ends of the room to each other. It was finally my chance to be brave. I took a second to compose myself then I locked eye contact with her and took 5 nervous steps towards her. I wrapped my arms round her taking in her feel and smell. She hugged me back but it was more than just a hug. It wasn't a hug of friendship. It was a moment of love, of passion. My hands roamed all over her body taking in how much my heart pounded at her feel. I reached her hair and laced my fingers through her long brunette locks. I then let go of her and took a step back. When I looked into her eyes I could see the burning desire I felt for her replicated in her own eyes for me.

"Sophie. I love you so much. I'm scared coz I've never felt like this for anyone. But it's a good scared now." I waited with baited breath to see what she said.

She didn't say a word. She just closed the gap between us and kissed me with more passion and longing then when we'd kissed a month ago.

This was it. There was no turning back now.

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**Like I said this has been my favourite chapter so i hope you like it. Please review and let me know what you think because I was quite nervous about uploading this one! **


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